Numb

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I choose to be numb
Numb to the sweet-bitter noise 
To the voices that ripple the surface of crystal clear depths
Deafening their silence 
Flooding the coolness of their rhythmic beating pulses 

But I struggle
Struggle to be numb
To be cold to the soothing hymning hisses 
Sweeping away my trance like crawling desert silicates 

Stealing it

Leading it to the palpitating lights
Taking it to the soul of strobing amber flights 

Dousing it 
Immersing it in oscillating groove
That tingles every tendon connecting the calcium to your muscles
Untangling it's winding fabrication
Loosening every pinch of its twinning extension
Undoing every contraction 
Neutralizing any retraction
Nibbling away it's strength like Alzheimer's biblical incarnation

Beautiful destruction

Sweating, staggering, blind with addiction

But still I struggle 
And struggle 

And as I fall

I choose the silence 
The calm
The unwavering motion of crystal clear depths...

I choose to be numb